Didn’t know my girlfriend used to be a prostitute

Dear Pastor,

I have a very serious problem. I am 41 years old and I am a member of a church. I was a very wild man, but I got converted and baptised. I met a woman in the church.

I found out that she loves me. We started to go out together and we became so close that we could not wait until we got married to have sex. I went to her house one Saturday for soup. She told me that she was making pig's tail soup and I could come by if I wanted some. We had the soup and we ended up in her bedroom.

I did not know that she used to be a prostitute. It was that night I found out. When I started to play with her she got wild and I could not keep up so I stopped. She started to fuss and I told her that what we were doing was not right. She hissed her teeth and told me I could go. So I got dressed and left.

I wondered what was going to happen to our relationship, but we made up and I went back to see her. This time we went through with it, but I feel so guilty because she asked me to do a few things that I have never done and I am not sure that as a Christian whether it is right to do these things.

This woman had me do 'spooning'. She told me that she does not practise prostitution any more, but she still thinks of herself as a whore. I don't know what to do now because I love her and I am wondering if I should go through with this marriage.

Give me your opinion.

L.

Dear L.,

I suggest that you and this woman go to see a family counsellor. If both of you intend to be married, then you should do so very soon because as I see it, this woman will drag you down. You would lose your testimony because if you cannot satisfy her, she would go to other men while she keeps you as her husband.

So whatever methods or positions that you know, be prepared to learn new ones.

Pastor