My grandmother has been my rock

Dear Pastor,

I am 20 years old and when I was 16, I met a man who told me that he loved me. I told him that I was not interested in a man.

I wanted to finish school and I did not want to concentrate on any relationship at that time. I was living with my grandmother. My mother had me when she was young and left me with my grandmother. My father was able to get my mother to America. She got married over there, but she sent everything that I needed to my grandmother to take care of me. So I was not interested in any man. In fact, I was afraid of men.

This man told me that he would wait on me until I was ready. I told him he may have a long time to wait. Then I got into trouble with the driver who used to take my grandmother around. One day he told me that he admired me and he would like us to be friends. I told my grandmother what he said to me and she told me that she would not hire him to take her anywhere. I was disappointed because I was getting to love him. One day he came to my school just to see me and I went into his car and he took me to Devon House. By the time I got home, my grandmother knew because somebody saw me with him and told her.

Although I was 16, my grandmother told me that she would beat me. She wanted to know whether I had sex with this man and I told her no. She threatened to search me, but I was able to convince her that nothing went on. I am now 20 years old and I am a graduate of a teachers' college; I am teaching now. My grandmother has built another room on the house just to make me more comfortable and my mother has got married and will soon get her green card.

I love teaching, but to me, the greatest teacher is my grandmother because she has taught me good morals and to not allow men to fool me.

L.C.

Dear L.C.,

I am glad to hear you speak so highly of your grandmother. Your biological mother got into trouble at a tender age and you came into the world as a result.

But your grandmother's love will always remain with you and you should remain grateful. Some parents turn their backs on their children when they go abroad, but your mother has not done so; she has tried her best. You knew you slipped up when you went to Devon House with this taxi man and someone told your grandmother who threatened you. You knew that if you did not humble yourself, she would have carried out her threats.

Now, I would say something to encourage you. Everybody makes mistakes sometimes, but it is not everybody who learns from their mistakes. Continue to put your confidence in God. You have a big responsibility as a teacher to teach young women to walk circumspectly, so to speak. They will love you for that.

Write to me again.

Pastor