My babyfather’s family don’t like me

October 08, 2021

Dear Pastor,

I am 26 years old and I am having a little problem. I got pregnant when I was 20 years old. The man who got me pregnant is educated, but I am not.

His people don't like me because they say I am a dunce. When I was to christen the baby, only one of his sisters showed up at the church because they said that they were ashamed to stand up at the altar with me and their son. I know I am not educated, but their son has not left me alone. We are still together and I can read much better now than when he first met me. He and his mother were not talking for a while because of the things she said about me. She described me in the most disgraceful way. She told her son that she knows so many girls who would be happy to have him and he is gone to a dunce. She didn't only call me dunce, but she also called me black and ugly. I am black, but I am not ugly and I can cook well. I was not able to get the education as some people because my parents were poor and my father was sickly. This man takes care of me and he takes care of his child. She is his first child. Since his mother called me ugly, he addresses me as beautiful and I love him for that. Recently, he has moved in with us and that is driving his mother crazy. I didn't think that he would come here and stay with us, but he bought a new bed and a dresser and he said he will stay here with us until the both of us are able to move and live together in a nice area. The only time he raises his voice at me is when I try to correct his daughter. I believe he has spoiled her. She prefers him over me. When we go out some people think we are married, but we are not. He is teaching me a lot of things that I did not know. He is a good man but I don't know how to deal with his people, especially his mother. So give me your advice.


Dear L.D.,

Make sure that you don't say anything negative about this man's mother. She is out of order to call you ugly and black. She should be ashamed of herself. You don't have any education according to you, but you are smart enough to have chosen an educated man to be your lover. But I repeat, do not say anything negative about his parents, especially his mother. I suppose this man has gone into his heart to be close to his daughter and to you. He has been teaching you many things. Remember you are not too old to go back to school, so do your very best to study online and as soon as it is possible, go to evening classes. Take care of yourself and your child and please keep in touch with me.


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